Nyoron
by AnimeDutchess
Summary: AkuRoku, 358/2 Days-verse, AkuRokuXion Friendship, Crack Fic. What exactly ARE Axel and Roxas writing, anyway?


_**Nyoron**_

By AnimeDutchess

A/N: Don't ask. Just…don't ask. I won't have an answer for you, anyway.

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Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts…or the origin of the "nyoron" meme, or the meme itself. You'll just have to make due with fanfiction.

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_Roxas ran up to Axel, smiling and breathless, blue eyes aglow. "Axel! Hey, Axel!"_

_The red-headed Nobody looked down (not in the negative way) at his partner, green eyes blank and bored._

_Roxas continued. "Did you know that I'm Sora's Nobody?" Axel continued to stare blankly at him._

_"Yes…Roxas." He muttered, his voice deadpan. Roxas's eyes grew wide, his smile wider, and tapped a finger to his lips quizzically. You could hear the "Nyoron" sound in the background -_

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"AXEL, YOU JERK! THAT'S NOT HOW IT HAPPENED!!" Blue eyes glared at his gangly friend, who had cracked up at the very outburst. "Why they hell're you making me so…so…disgustingly cutesy?!" When Axel didn't answer him right away, Roxas flung a pillow at his head.

"Whoa!" Green eyes that had been squeezed tightly in mirth were now flooded with the sight of the white covering of the feather-filled pillow. Axel took the pillow away from his face and hugged it to his stomach, leaning on it slightly. "Calm down, Roxas, I'm only writing it for fun…"

"And you're making me a WUSS!" The blond was seething, but that wasn't unusual; Roxas overreacted to _everything_…you'd think that Nobodies wouldn't react at all. But that was why Axel loved Roxas; his rare dramatics about some of the most random things seemed so honest compared to how other some of their fellow Nobodies acted about everything. It made him feel…like his heart hadn't left.

But going even further into this would be rather confusing, and Axel didn't like to be confused.

"Well, not really…you _are_ insanely cute, Roxy…" A second pillow flew towards him, but Axel just leaned forward, and it flew over him, landing with a _plop_ on the floor. The two stared at it for a moment.

"…Get up, Ax. Let me write something real quick."

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_"Roxas! Hey, Roxas!"_

_Roxas looked up, his eyes a blank blue. Axel was running up to him, grinning like an idiot…an adorable idiot, but an idiot nonetheless. The adorable idiot reached Roxas, his green eyes reflecting his idiotic smile, and out of his mouth came one of the weirdest questions Roxas had ever heard._

_"Can Nobodies make babies?"_

_Roxas was silent, his eyes as blank as ever._

_"…No…Axel…"_

_The sound of "Nyoron" could be heard as Axel tapped his lip with his finger, giving Roxas a cute – yet creepy – wide-eyed stare-_

...

"…When did this happen? I don't remember it…"

"S-Shut up! I just wanted to write it."

"…"

"…What?"

Roxas was not expecting to be glomped from behind by his older male friend.

"You really think I'm an adorable idiot? Oh, Roxy, that's so sweet of you!" Axel hugged tighter as Roxas flailed slightly in his arms.

"Wagh! Axel, leggo!" The red-head just snickered.

"Why? You're not an Eggo waffle…" Then, in a husky voice, he added, "I know from experience that you taste better than one." He erupted into snickers when he saw Roxas's face flush to a brilliant crimson. Oh, he was on a roll today…might as well continue teasing the short blond.

"And what about this line?" Axel asked, pointing to a line of text on the computer screen. "About Nobodies and babies…are you trying to tell me something, Roxy?" He grinned at the uncomfortable expression on Roxas's face. "Subliminal messaging, maybe?" Then, in an almost demeaning tone (although he didn't mean for it to be demeaning at all), he added, "Does Roxy wanna have my babies?"

_FWACK_

Axel was hardcore; he could take a slap in the face without flinching. Didn't make it hurt any less.

"That was cold, Roxas. Very cold."

"Well, if your body temperature wasn't constantly over one-hundred degrees…" Roxas muttered. He then blinked and shook his head rapidly, as though to clear his thoughts. "Gah! That's not the point! I wasn't trying to say _any_thing-"

"-Well, you didn't have to _slap_ me-"

"-And you don't have to act so stupid! You're not Demyx-"

"-Hey, _hey_! He was born stupid. I'm just good at pretending to be stupid-"

"-In my book, that, in turn, makes you stupid!"

They both glared at each other silently for a while.

"…Make-up sex?"

"…Sure, why not?"

But before they could get started, they heard someone timidly knocking on the door.

"Axel? Roxas?" It was the soft, nervous voice of the Organization's newest member, Xion. The two boys didn't know how or why she became their friend, but she was a sweet kid nonetheless.

"Door's open," Axel shouted. A pause.

"…Are you both dressed?" They sweat-dropped at that, remembering the time when Xion had accidentally walked in on one of their sex-capades.

"Yes…" Roxas said. The doorknob turned, and Xion stepped into the room cautiously, a plastic bag in her hands. Black bangs brushed over her sapphire eyes.

"I was just…well…" Her fingers fiddled with the strap of the bag. "I finished a mission in Twilight Town…and thought, you know…I should get us all some ice cream…"

The boys stared blankly at her for a second. Then…

"Oh, wow!" Roxas's face brightened up. "Thanks, Xion! This is awesome!" Axel nodded in agreement.

"Yeah, that's thoughtful of you." Xion looked overjoyed with their kind words, and gave them a sweet smile.

Neither of the three seemed to hear the sweet crooning of "Nyoron" as they dug into their ice cream.

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A/N: Xion is NOT the death of AkuRoku! I am definitely sure of it…I've got my own theories, but let's face it, this isn't a forum.

Yeah…this just kind of became crackfic-ish…but I've been meaning to write something with Xion in it, anyway!

So, review me! And don't flame Xion-Chan; her existence might actually be beneficial to AkuRoku! Ja Ne! - AnimeDutchess


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